I'd Like to Apologize to the Academy

Roebot Online.

If I had to receive any award right now it would be the "Terrible Blogger" statue. I'm sorry everyone I goofed, I goofed hard, I should have kept this up way more than I did and I've disappointed millions (millions of the people that read this in my mind, I think I only have two really). Regardless, let's quit feeling sorry for ourselves and get right to the point. My ultimate goal.

Conceited isn't it? That this blog be talking about me and what I love rather than you and what you love. If you don't like it feel free to go write your own blog, I'll follow and read it with a happy heart knowing someone else out there is working hard at what they love. I digress, what is it that the Roebot wants out of his dream? Clearly I want to create art, but to what end? Do I wish for millions of dollars to rain down upon me, perhaps a cultish following to my work, or maybe I just want one dedicated fan to clap after every one of my films.

Who doesn't want this?
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Well, to be honest I kind of want it all (a real filmmaker wants the whole lot (kudos if you get the gangster film reference)). I do want financial success, coming from a family who doesn't exactly have the green to make the scene, money is an important factor. I would love to have what Lucas, Nolan, Spielberg, and Scorsese have. That following of fans that will always be loyal to them and only them. I also want a true fan, that even if I may sell out, even if I don't live up to expectations they will still start the applause for me.

Most of all, I really want to win an Oscar. While I would love to go to everyone of my competitors and flash it in their faces, it isn't for gloating either. It's for my mother. Corny I know (cue the 'awwww's) but it really is. I want to prove to her that my dream became a reality. I'm even getting a little choked up writing this, I just want to make her proud of my works. And while she does say it now, she hugs me and tells me how great I am, I want to prove it. I want to stand on the stage and thank her for every little thing she's taught me.

That's really it, that's all I want. I know that I would of course celebrate the fact that I alone won the Oscar and that I would brag to most of my friends, but it isn't just about having the gold statue. It means so much more to me, to my mother, to everything I stand for. It's a trophy of a hard work and dedication and I would dedicate that to Susan Roe, the woman who made me love film and never once stopped believing in me.

Mi madre.

Just as a little treat, here's how I think the speech would play out:

When they call my name I would begin freaking out. Everyone around me would clap and cheer, I would look down at my mother and she would smile at me. Hug and kiss me, and then I would be off to the stage. Knowing me I would trip along the way, but I'm nervous what can I say.

I would get to the podium with the Oscar in hand and I would stare out amongst the mass of A-listers and seat fillers and I wouldn't be able to speak.

One day.
(image)

"The funny things about writers is that everyone assumes we are good with words. Truth be told we aren't. We can't do anything without writing it out first."

People would chuckle, perhaps some groans would be let out as people expect the worse, and I would deliver it.

I would produce a page about 10feet long and unfurl it as though I was going to read it. Playing up a bit of the comedy. Eventually I would toss it away.

"I'm joking of course. I would really like to thank the Academy for believing in me, believing in my story enough to honor it with this prestigious golden man. But more importantly I want to thank someone whose been with me since the beginning. My mother. She taught me the joys of cinema like no other, she lifted me up when I was down, and never ever gave up on me."

People would probably get misty eyed, music would probably start playing softly.

"So mom, this is for you, and for you alone. Thanks for everything."

What I hope to see.
(image)

I would thank everyone else of course but give her the most recognition. People would clap and I would then clam up and leave the stage, holding back some tears.

It's kind of pitiful when I write it out but that's how I think it would probably go down. Let's just hope I get to that point. You stay behind me and who knows what I can accomplish.

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Finding Films Offensive

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As the weekend has come to an end, it's no surprise that Hollywood is facing massive backlash due to the unfortunate incident in Aurora, CO (if you haven't heard about it, you live under a rock). 12 murdered, over 50 injured, in what is supposed to be a safe environment, the movie theater. It's a sad day when people are scared to go see a film just because of one nutter.

The theater where the massacre took place
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 Nolan released this statement in response "The movie theatre is my home, and the idea that someone would violate that innocent and hopeful place in such an unbearably savage way is devastating to me." And truer words have never been spoken. Many attempt to find solace in a theater, escape into something amazing and fantastic, not be concerning themselves with checking every fire escape in case some guy comes in gun blazing.

Somber Nolan is somber.
(image)

But the reason I'm talking about this (which is surprising even me, I'm sick of hearing about the whole damned thing) is because of something that Warner Bros. decided to do today. In September they were to release a film called Gangster Squad, set back in Hollywood's hayday following a group of cops that go off the books to try and right the wrongs of so many gangsters.

Looks awesome right?
(image)

If you haven't seen the trailer (good like finding the unedited one) there is a scene depicting gunmen walking through a movie theater's screen and shooting up the place. We have no idea what the context is, but one can assume it's to "take out the trash", so what's the big deal? Well isn't it obvious? It shows a lack of tact for those who were affected by the attacks...yeah...right...

NON CENSORED WOO!

Now had this film not already shot the scene, written the scene, and advertised the scene this wouldn't be a problem. However they hit all three (the wonderful film hattrick) and teased many individuals with the idea of "Holy cow, that looks awesome!" Instead it is now a blight on the film and they have removed it from the trailers.

But wait...that's not all they have also decided that the scene will be removed from the film entirely and re-shoots will need to take its place. What the hell!? This film isn't coming out in summer it's coming out in fall, those of you who would be offended could just simply close their eyes during that scene but instead WB has decided to outright censor it.

Get it?
(image)

Where do we draw the line? Yes this may be your generic gangster killing movie, guns, sex, violence and all but it is still a piece of art! No one should ever willingly censor art, no matter how the public feels about it.

If this is so damn offensive, why don't we cut out 9/11 references from every movie? Why not go back to films that depict the Twin Towers and digitally alter them out (oh wait there is a list). Better yet, how about we no longer show suicide in films because people kill themselves on a daily basis!? I ask you, WHEN DOES IT STOP!!?

I'm very passionate about art, film especially (if you couldn't tell already), and I strongly disagree with the idea of re-shooting some parts to very discretely cover it up. It just doesn't seem fair in the slightest, especially when it was an isolated incident. Now had multiple attacks across the nation sparked up, yeah maybe then I could see it happening, but even then that's a stretch.

The film is in no way glorifying mass murder in a movie theater. It is not telling you "hey this is a good idea" instead it simply is just illustrating a scene that was probably pivotal to the movie (thus the re-shoots). But I understand completely, I get it, you don't want to turn away your audience and I understand that. However, this was clearly going to be an R-rated film, no ifs ands or buts about it. So why bother with this one thing? Hell I would be okay with them even putting a viewer discretion sticker on there, OH WAIT that's the MPAA rating. The fact is, no matter what you do you will always offend someone. It takes courage to say "Hey, I'm not going to mind if this offends you, take it for what it is." That's what artists do, but unfortunately it's not what production companies do.

I always knew what it was built on.
(image)

I know it's all for the sake of getting money, they want to look good to public and all that jazz but just as a service for the rest of us, who don't really mind when things push the limit, just push it this once. Let this scene stay in the film, it looked incredible. But my calls shall go unheeded, I'll be muted out while they count their cash.

And that folks is Hollywood, that is the industry I want to be a part of, and even silly little things like this won't stop my love for going to the movies, crazy whackjobs or cutting things out and all. I still love film, now and forever.

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Film Friday: Christopher Nolan

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Sorry for the non posting as of late, just got a bit hectic here at Roebot Land. Anyway onto Film Friday (applaud here).

So as you may be aware Christopher Nolan's latest and greatest Batman film, The Dark Knight Rises, came out today. How many of you went to see it? For those of you who haven't, I'll forgive you if you go see it by the end of the weekend. If not I'm sending Bane right after you.

I will break you...if you don't see my movie.
(image)

 It was great, it was amazing and it is my favorite of his trilogy, but I'm biased. I love Bane as a villain (he's in fact my favorite), and I love Nolan's films, well most of them anyway. So without further adieu I bring you a brief, fun history of Nolan's works.

Ahhh my inspiration!
(image)

When Nolan went to college he actually didn't major in Film, but instead English. See Nolan is all about the story, which is my favorite part of any film! So clearly I love this man (number two in my favorite directors list).

He's also a bit of an inspiration for me. Starting out with making short films he eventually built his way up through the ranks to direct his first feature Following. Which is about the dangers of stalking, from a stalker's perspective (that's putting it lightly by the way, much deeper than that (but to be honest I still haven't seen it)). When it showcased at the San Francisco Film Festival in 1998 it eventually attracted bigger production companies to his work.

Following poster
(image)

 Then enters Memento, which has since become a cult film about a man with short term memory loss looking for the man who murdered his wife. It's a very interesting movie and really well done with the different way it's told (completely reversed/out of chronological order) which brought it up to it's stardom level. It also boosted Guy Pearce into more films, but he has since somewhat laid low.

"Have you seen this movie?"
(image)

 Following Memento (see what I did there, two Nolan films...I'm so clever) came Insomnia, my least favorite of his works, simply because he actually didn't write it (or have his brother do it). Not only that but the casting (aside from Williams) was a bit off, it just didn't seem to work. Still a good movie however because Nolan can take any story and turn it into a pretty darn good one.

Work soon followed again with the beginning of his magnum opus the Batman Trilogy (Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, & The Dark Knight Rises). I can't tell you how amazing it is in text form, just please go watch them right now. That's all.

Only second to original Star Wars.
(image)

After the initial Batman Begins was The Prestige, based on a novel. Also a great film about obsession, love and magic. Seriously this is called one of Nolan's best. But then a swan song emerged, and it is called Inception. This genre combining masterpiece really upped the ante for me when it came to Nolan's work. I enjoyed him already thanks to what he was doing with Batman and how Memento, played out but this just was an absolute game changer.

It will mindfuck you...so damn hard.
(image)

Like I said, the man knows story, and this does not disappoint. A heist film that takes place entirely in your head...what the hell? How could that possibly work? Well people, it does, and it does wonderfully. I really don't want to drag you all into this, because it would basically be me typing for a few pages about how great Nolan's films are without really delving into why.

Nolan like many other directors has under his belt a writer/director credit. He also works with his brother Jonathan Nolan on almost everything under the sun. He also tag teams with his wife as a producer so he can really cut loose. And he does, with his brilliant story telling and masterful way behind the camera.

Certain shots in Inception, literally brought tears to my eyes, as they also did in The Dark Knight Rises. He composes a shot perfectly and uses his IMAX know-how to really bring certain scenes to an amazing level (even if he has broken two in the process). His attention to detail is amazing and just all around one of the best filmmakers in this day and age.

Another huge factor for me to favor Nolan is that he brings a crusade against digital film making. He believes that films are meant to be shot on film, not some memory card (albeit he and I differ here, but I believe that major motion pictures should be shot on film stock). The point being while the world marches against him, and pushes for a digital age (especially 3D, people are hounding him about that that) he remains strong against them and pushes for celluloid.

The never ending debate.
(image)

 In short, Nolan is great. That's all you really need to know, if you didn't know that already that is. Stay tuned for more regular posting and next week we'll talk about my number one guy!

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Green to Make the Scene

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As anyone will tell you in the world, it takes money to get anywhere (save for your stoop, or the street). Hollywood however doesn't just need money, it demands money. The industry revolves around the Jacksons and the Franklins (quick, who is on those bills?), and you need both to get anywhere worth mentioning. There is no way to make a film for nothing, that's the sad truth.

The Red...the most expensive camera to exist.
(image)

 The moment you buy a camera, or even pay for a camera phone, you have officially invested money in your career as a film maker, no ifs ans or buts about it. As much as I would love to have a story where I just happen to stumble by a Canon 5D Mark II, with an 84GB SD Card and a Macbook Pro preloaded with Final Cut Studio X, that just won't happen (a guy can dream though right?). So what is someone like you supposed to do? Someone who wants to create but cannot afford all the wonderful amenities that would come with being super rich.? Easy, balance money.

You just gotta find that balance.
(image)

 I know a lot of people have trouble with that, I did when I was younger (that's why my DVD collection is over 300 strong). Here are some helpful tips I can give you when it comes to trying to balance money about.

Wall Street teaches you how to properly get money.
(image)

Instead of eating out all the time, buy the ingredients you want to eat what you were going when you went out. You'll be able to make that meal four times over! When it comes to an editing program there are a lot online that are free/a small amount that do pretty well. At the moment I use AVS4You which was free, it gets the job done (not Final Cut obviously). Don't buy a camera that's over $1,000 unless you plan on having that with you AT ALL TIMES! (I have a friend who has a $4,000 camera that he barely uses) You need to make sure the money you invest in trying to make your films look good, is something you can use on a daily basis.

When it boils down to it, money sucks. You can either buy everything you want (because you're Billy Gates) or you struggle to make ends meet. Sure there is that comfort level, but you don't want to spend a whole lot because you're worried about being knocked down a bracket. The thing is, don't worry about that comfort level. My mantra is "Money comes and money goes." Spend like you mean it, but do spend wisely.

Couldn't have said it better myself
(image)

The fact of the matter is money can't buy you happiness, your dreams make you happy. It just sucks that they kind of need one another. Damn you money, you green conniving bitch.

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Film Friday: The Coen Brothers!

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Today marks another milestone, it's my first ever FILM FRIDAY! (cue applause). This day is dedicated to the film world (specifically my favorite parts of it) and how they've shaped me into the avid film lover/film maker that I am today.

I could go with my atypical favorites (Tarantino, Smith, Anderson, Scorsese and Nolan) but I figure I'd point out someone a little more obscure. In case you haven't seen films like No Country for Old Men, Fargo, or The Big Lebowski, than I must say you've been missing out on the greatest directing duo to exist. The Coen Brothers.

The Coen Brothers and their awards.
(image)

Now I'll admit, it isn't strange to be a fan of their films (in fact most people would say they were fans just because of Lebowski) but the way they create such interesting humor in some of the darkest situations is why I truly love their work as much as I do.

Fargo Poster
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I won't go on talking about The Big Lebowski, because I sincerely hope you've seen it. If you haven't, please stop reading this blog and watch it. You will not be disappointed. However, in lieu of that I'll be talking about Fargo, a hilarious tale of murder and deception in the middle of nowhere town of Fargo.

While the humor doesn't come from fart jokes or a tiger in your bedroom after waking up from a killer hangover, it derives from the characters and their interactions as well as their reactions to the brutal murders that are taking place in their fair city. This creates an entirely new cinematic experience with a different type of comedy (my personal favorite dark comedy (not to be mistaken with Black Comedy that's Chris Rock)).

However that is not my favorite of their work; instead I the artist (pronounce as are-teast to sound extra snobby) has fallen deeply in love with what I consider their masterpiece, Barton Fink. It has a simple enough story, a playwright from New York gets a job writing films in Hollywood after the success of his play (FANCY THAT, I like a film about movies and more importantly about writing, that's just so unlike me (sarcasm)). However, it's a character study about the human brain and its creative process. Barton has some trouble writing and searches out inspiration from the people around him, except he has trouble with finding like minded individuals in Hollywood.

"John...YOU HAVE TO WATCH BARTON FINK!"
(image)

Not only do the characters really help bring the story to life but also the tone of the film. The mood, setting, costumes, music, all that really help bring the film to another level. Much like other films, it takes place in old Hollywood, roughly about the time "talkies" were coming out and being widely accepted. It just works, simple as that.

If you're a fan of film or Hollywood in general, watch Barton Fink, it just flows wonderfully.

Another great thing about the Coen Brothers is the fact that they have a set of stock actors (stock actors are actors that the director or directors enjoy so much that they show up frequently to play other roles in their films, now you know, and knowing is half the battle!). John Goodman, John Turturro, Jeff Bridges, and many others are consistently showcased in the Coen's films. Each time they manage to one up the characters that they played previously.

Click and zoom in on this bad boy to see how far their stock actors really flow.
(image)

If you want to judge on merit alone they have had 13 Oscar nominations and won four. That is an impressive number considering Scorsese (one of the most recognized men in Hollywood, just received his first a few years back). But it's no wonder that they have so many notches in their belt. Instead of just treating movies as mindless entertainment, they bring out an almost novel like story telling that really pulls you in and takes you for a wild ride. With metaphors abound, it's no wonder that the Coen's are some of my favorite faces in Hollywood right now.

That does it for this week; tune in next time where I will explore more deeply into one of my top five favorite creators in Hollywood.

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Production Wednesday!

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Today (yes technically it's Thursday but it's still Wednesday to me) is my first Production Wednesday. Where I will talk to you all about what is going on in the inner workings of Roebot Films and the projects that we have lined up.

First and foremost we have a project that is in partnership with Ergo Pictures (the old Youtube group I use to do videos with). It's a low budget action comedy about creating lemonade stands (hence the title Lemonade Stand) I've gone ahead and attached a page from the script that I think will give you an idea as to what goes down as the lemons begins to fly.

Just one of the pages of the script for
Lemonade Stand.

 Not only that but Roebot Films finally has an actual designer. Erik (ELS Designs) is a fantastic graphic artist who has really helped make Roebot Films what it is. Designing the logo and the title sequence for my videos has fired us up to become a great production company. And just tonight he brought over a mock up poster for Lemonade Stand (which I've also attached for your enjoyment).

He said he did this in an hour,
I couldn't hope to do this in
a week!

As far as solo projects go, I have a few in mind. All involving my little chub monster Poe. One of them will be a joke trailer that I talked about in previous posts. But why my kitty? Because like I said, you gotta sell out and that's what the internet calls for. BIG FAT KITTIES! Not only that but I've come up with a somewhat experimental film where it's a relationship through a cat's eyes. Instead of seeing the people head on you see them from their cute fluffy companion's big round eyes. Just a simple idea.

The star of some soon to be Roebot Films Shorts!

I've got a 1000 and 1 scripts that I could do, plenty of projects I could do but there in lies a problem. Lack of funds. I don't have a huge budget, otherwise I wouldn't be spending my time here, but instead I would be making films at all hours of the day. Luckily enough it seems as though the times they are a changing.

My mother (bless her she's probably sick of these mentions) is looking to potentially aid in my endeavor. Whether or not it's her vicariously living through me it doesn't matter. I'll take any kind of support I can get at this point. However I'm just getting a leg up, a lot of the heavy lifting I will have to do my own

For example, I'll be purchasing my Macbook Pro and my editing software while she assists (not pay for all, because if she were rich this wouldn't be an issue) with the camera. I find that she's not doing it out of motherly love but that she believes in my talent. I pitched to her over dinner what I want to do with Roebot Films and I feel as though she is finally seeing the light through the overwhelming doubt shadow.

Soon...my precious...soon.
(image)

In other news, I'm diligently working on my second feature length film. I wrote one in a session of three days (non stop working except for the occasional bathroom break (thank god for a minifridge in a room)). That one needs work, but this one has been two years in the making. Simply called Eden. That's really all I can give you all. It's going to be great (if and when I sell it) and I'm just so happy to be working.

Yes some may say this was a pointless blog, not nearly as funny or enjoyable to read but it helps me and it helps you. It helps me by keeping me in line with what I'm doing as well as it helps you know what the company is doing. Maybe you find it interesting, maybe not but it's all the same to me. Roebot Films is all about doing what it takes to revolutionize Hollywood and I hope you all as my would-be audience will join me on my journey to take the silver screen by storm.

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What It Takes

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I've never claimed to be the greatest filmmaker alive (because let's face it, if I were I wouldn't be doing this would I?). But I've also never claimed to be anything but a filmmaker. At my core that's what I am. I analyze films, study them, create them, critique them, I do it all and that is simply because that's who I am.

This is at my center, my core.
(image)

 But how I can I get to the super stardom that I deserve? Student films are sure enough one way to do so, but it's hard to imagine making a 'THX-1138' (Lucas' first film, which ultimately led him to Star Wars!) in this day and age. People question me all the time, in fact I recall two friends of mine having a primitive intervention with me saying "You've got all these scripts written, what are you doing with them?" When I tried to protest and let them know it's not that easy, they drunkenly shot me down. They wouldn't have any of it. In a way I found that somewhat encouraging and in another way I found it absolutely infuriating.

They don't know what it takes to be the real deal in the film world. They think that it's as easy as one, two, three (because everyone knows that all it takes are three easy things to get anything you want, am I right?). But it isn't. Some of my written work, which I have over 30 scripts (a melting pot of shorts and one feature), just doesn't quite work for the industry. It's just that easy, so while it appears I'm doing nothing, I am changing my style, upping the ante and tweaking myself to become exactly what I need to be in order to charm my way into the industry.

But it doesn't just take a compelling story, if you want to just write you have to win a multitude of awards for scripts you've written, or short/indie produced films that come from your creative mind. If you want to direct you have to do all that and more, you have to have an eye for something that no one else can. To break into Hollywood, you have to be the same as the last guy, but better and different in every other way.

As it stands my most current idol is Christopher Nolan (a true genius, who isn't a fan of the new Batman films?).

THE MAN, THE LEGEND!
(image)

 He has revolutionized the way we see movies in this day and age. While the world around him screams for digital work, he sticks to celluloid and actually building sets/stunt rooms in order to give film that sense of realism.

The infamous Hallway Scene in Inception
was actually built to rotate!
(image)

It's awe-inspiring to say the very least. But more to the point, how can I, a 21 year old, 3 years into community college, overweight, waiter become the next great thing? Tenacity.

You hear everyday about the people that gave up on their dreams (my mother did, if you read my older posts). That it was too hard for them to truly grasp what they wanted and they gave up because it just wasn't real. I for one could care less about how realistic a dream is, because that's what it is. A dream (within a dream, within another dream. Sorry had to Inceptionalize some humor into this blog), and you just don't give up. That's the main difference between me and the would be artists of the world. They gave up.

The other day I ran into a friend of mine at a movie theater (12:01 Amazing Spider-Man how could I resist?). Anyway, this friend in question is a very talented artist. In fact I was a bit jealous of her, her paintings, illustrations, and just general vibe for the art-world made my prose look like garbage (to a few it may actually be that). I envied that creative fire in her so much that it kick-started me back into chasing after my dream (yes I will admit I lapsed when the retail world was sucking away at my very soul). Now I find out, straight from her mouth, that the art-world wasn't working out...so she switched to nursing. The rage of Hades himself fumed underneath my skin.

NURSING!? BUT EVERYONE IS DOING THAT!
DO SOMETHING UNIQUE, LIKE I DUNNO
ART?!?!?!?
(image)

A TALENT THAT IS GOING TO WASTE!? How dare that happen, IN MY REALM!?!?! I composed myself and simply walked away stating "We will talk." (I have yet to, here's hoping she reads this) I just was dumbfounded by it all, a close friend of mine was falling into the trap that my own mother and so many before and after her have fallen into. A trap of comfort over dreams, where you would rather have a full dinner than break open the Top Ramen. I was hurt, I felt betrayed, and yet the fire inside me still burns.

Even though I saw her fall to this trap I know I will not, that I am the real deal (or reel deal (get it)). I want my dream bad enough to make it a reality, that I truly cannot be stopped on my quest to greatness. It's just a matter of when I get there. Scorsese won his first Academy Award after 44 years(for the film 'The Departed' which is amazing!)...it took that man more than half his life to finally be recognized by the most prestigious group in all of Hollywood. And even if it takes me that long to get to any point in Hollywood, I'll relish in that journey.

Scorsese thoughts: "Took them long enough
been waiting forever, shoulda got it for
Goodfellas."
(image)

I just best be prepared for a heavy Top Ramen diet.
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